My Process of Awakening..
Wow, what a year it has been and the path had brought upon my challenges plus many healing along the way. 2018 has been an interesting year for me as it brought about a lot of opportunities for me to heal and rid of the many separate selves that I have carried over from many embodiments on this planet. I felt so much lighter spiritually as well as physically. I lost 20 lbs this year by eating a healthier diet inspired by my I AM Presence and also becoming much more calmer and much less reactive to the things of this world. I felt more at peace, more harmonious and more content with myself; needing less validation from the outside world and having more attunement within. And I felt that as I walk a higher path, I see less contrast, more oneness and more willingness to serve in any capacity I am in in raising the whole. I am not interested to be famous, popular nor super rich to be propelled onto the podium like I was in my earlier life. While I am still somewhat serious in living this life on Earth, I am getting better in being relaxed and less serious with the path and more focused on enjoying my life on this planet while continually working on my psychology so I am be more free from the bondage of my own created selves.
In this end of the year, I am inspired by my I AM Presence to write a piece about my own personal awakening process, so I can share with all of you the process of how I got to where I am today. What I am writing to you is about someone who was not spiritual all his life, awakened and then embracing the masters teaching.
When I was young boy, I always had this sense that I am not a human being, but rather someone who is spiritual and out of this world. At the age of 3 or so (I can't remember the exact age), I was visited by a female light being (she was a form of bright sparkling light; wavy curtain light with the brilliance of a fine silk cloth) that looks almost like an angel from a book I read somewhere when I was young. At least that was what I believed an angel should look like. I remembered that her presence was warm, comforting and reassuring to me. That motherly reassurance was not something that I had ever received from a human being. At least not the women I had dated and slept with (had sex with). Not even my biological mother could give this spiritual motherly love. It was as if that connection was made in my heart. Of course over the years, my disappointment from the women I dated and had sex with were they couldn't give me that same feeling, usually after an orgasm or two I expected something in the heart. But it usually ended up being very empty feeling and then I have to work up another sexual session only to experience another physical orgasm and nothing else afterwards. Anyhow, I don't want to go on a tangent here with women, but that was that motherly love that I received from this female spiritual being that I couldn't get from the physical. Also when I was younger, I was also suffering from G.A.D (General Anxiety Disorder) and I was anxious in the public. I was not able to do a public speech or even introducing myself to the group caused me to sweat profusely. So when I was young, I always tried to sit at the back of class and possibly hide myself from my teacher or classmates, because I simply don't want to be picked out by my teacher to do a speech or even read out loud. Strangely enough, I am very social in the group and I always have a sense that I like being a community leader, but if someone asked me to speak on stage -- NO WAY JOSE man.. No way!
Afflicted with G.A.D, I was basically living an introverted life. I was alone and I felt that if I isolate myself from the public, I will feel better. So I took up a hobby in computers; building, repairing and programming. Also at the same time, my doctor prescribed me with Prozac to manage my anxiety disorder and my depression at the time, because I didn't have a lot of friends then. My sister had way more friends than I did. After taking Prozac, I felt good again and started to become active and venturing out into the public. But there is a side effect to taking Prozac and that was weight gain. So I was a bit chubby and I suddenly crave a lot of sugary and salty stuff like chocolate, burgers, fries -- anything that isn't what you call it very healthy. Anyhow, my dad who was a distant runner himself decided to get me into running in the attempt to help me shave my weight and as a reward for doing that, he'll buy me breakfast after the run. And so, at 4 AM on every Sunday morning, he would wake me up and get me dressed for the run. At first, I hated waking up that early. I mean, I was 13 years old and I needed my long sleep. But my dad wouldn't have any of those excuses from me. We need to run to save my weight! One the first few Sundays, I hated the run. I just hated it!! Huffing and puffing and sweating; I thought who the bloody hell ever invented running as a past time!?! How can one really enjoy running!!!??!! Bloody s**t and bloody f**ing hell were my normal cursing language at the time while running up the bloody f**ing mountain. I simply don't understand how my dad could have enjoyed running at all! He must be a total nut case. I thought my dad lost his marbles; he was insane to take me out running! But with all that anger, the breakfast with lots of bacon and eggs and buttery toast and the hot Horlicks (an Asian tasty drink like milk tea) usually cooled me down. Ok I said, this wasn't so bad.
Anyhow, after a month later, I think my body started to get acclimatized to it and I actually enjoyed running. Another benefit that came from running was that, it helped managed my anxiety, my migraines and depression. After the run, I felt really good and fresh. And soon, I was off Prozac. As long as I run at least 2 to 3 times a week, I was able to manage the symptoms of my anxiety, depression and migraines. I ran so much that I joined my local school's track and field team and ran the national in Hong Kong (I was living there for a bit with parents) and won Bronze. I was proud then and I felt I was so good. Then in 1984, my dad decided to move to Canada due to the China's repatriation of Hong Kong. He didn't want to have any dealing with the Communist system. So when I landed in a new country, Canada, with no friends, my anxiety and depression came roaring back. I still managed to control the symptoms with running, but now I had another problem. All of a sudden, I had lower back issues and also my neck started to feel sore out of the blue. At first, I attributed this to simply running too much. So what I did was I lessened my running and yet the back and neck pain persists. And so, in order to fix my back and neck issues, I started seeing both a Chiropractor and a Physiotherapist. I also started working for a Japanese camera company at the time so I had the benefits to pay for those visits. Anyhow, I managed to control the symptoms, but those symptoms of anxiety, migraines and depression never actually went away. Year after year, I have more anxiety, migraines and depression and year after year, I have to do more sports like running marathons, doing long distance cycling and swimming and therapy just to manage my issues. It became so bad that I literally spent in some years the whole day training for a marathon or cycling for days to just feel good. At that time also, my work in the Japanese company was not smooth and easy going. While working, I have this sense within myself to express the truth about how I feel is the truth. But every time I wanted to express this truth out loud in public, in front of my CEO and boss, I heard this voice telling me -- don't do this, it is very bad to say that to your boss. Be loyal and work hard and you'll be happy. And every time I felt this way, I always feel very angry to myself for not being gutsy enough to stand up and speak the truth. Then something else beats me up inside saying that you should say the truth and speak out. And this conflict and chaos was causing me anxiety, depression and migraines because I should have done something but I didn't! But then, it was always me since I was young that I didn't have a say on anything I want to do. It was always some authority figure that tells me what to do. Also when I was younger, my dad told me that lying is good; it gets you ahead in business. So I was in conflict being a liar and telling the truth. Anyhow, I'm getting ahead of myself again here which sometimes I do; sorry.
A few years later, the anxiety and depression got so bad that I almost contemplated of commiting suicide. There was this voice telling me that my life wasn't worth the while. I am better of dead and that my life was completely meaningless. It was in 1999 where there was this doomsday prediction that the world actually would come to pass. It would end. So at the time, I was actually involving in some very risky activities and I didn't care a bit about my life. If it ends in 1999, then so be it. I was happy to see that my misery would end in 1999. But then, I had this thought and feeling of that motherly love, the same feeling I had when I was 3. Then and there, she appeared in my dreams telling me that I am destined to do something great, something so profound that when I come to realize this, I will know what it truly meant. When I awoke, I was full of sweat and somehow bruised. I didn't know how I got these bruises, but now I think it was those dark forces who realized that I am awakening and that they tried to suppress me and encourage to commit suicide or die. To stop me to even start my mission.
Anyhow, after that experience and my dad's insistence that I should take up martial arts, I decided to enrol myself into a Japanese martial arts society. I felt I was drawn to this particular society because of the words they used in their website, which I later on realized, it was the energy that were in the words that I recognized. The energy of oneness, the energy of Christhood (their definition is the universe in always moving and never stops) and the energy of unity.
Besides, running, swimming and cycling were getting way out of hand and my dark thoughts of killing myself -- I needed something spiritual, something Zen to help me get myself into the right focus.
This spiritual society is very unique in a sense that it teaches, martial arts, meditation and energy healing as a whole unit with the emphasis of oneness with the universe; which is your I AM. Their teachings are in fact very similar to the Ascended Master teachings. At the time, I didn't know what Ascended Masters are and who are they. Anyhow, the Japanese spiritual society resonated with me and the chief Sensei was able to teach me spiritual meditation and energy healing plus martial arts that these teachings actually helped me reduce my anxiety, depression and migraines that I didn't have to rely on physical means like running, cycling and swimming to manage them. As my meditation got deeper and deeper, I started to get a sense that there is something more than this Earth and that there is this presence that I should connect to. At the time during my energy healing training, I also was a natural in being the channel for the holy spirit. Within 6 months of a 2 years energy healing training, I was able to do what my Sensei could only master in 8 years! In fact the other students was asking Sensei; what David could do this or that and why we couldn't? Sensei had to concoct some excuses to explain away. But Sensei seemed to have a sense that I am different. For me, this society gave me a sense of belonging and acceptance. I quickly became an instructional assistance, teaching students on how to become the conduit for the holy spirit. It was somewhat natural to me and that sometimes got the other official instructors who held black belts, in their jealousy taunt me or sometime try to correct me what I wasn't teaching right. But I always felt that they were teaching in a linear way with a linear mindset and not with a spiritual mind. Anyhow, belonging to this spiritual society was the best choice I made, because I actually, or so I thought cured all my ailments. No anxiety, no depression, no migraines and back and neck pain were managed and under control that for once, I was pain free. And then at the time, I was even more bold, willing to be in public and so I represent my Japanese company as a professional imaging rep and technician, speaking with people from different backgrounds and for a while espousing spiritual teachings disguising as camera and electronics talk. You have to internalize the spiritual teachings and then paraphrase it in your own words and your experience to teach others, so others can relate to your teachings. Everything went well; I have a teaching position in my spiritual organization, I was pain free and the company I worked at was doing well and I was making good money.
BUT -- BUT. I still have this feeling that I didn't quite do what I am supposed to do. It was this nagging feeling, despite everything outside of me are good.
Then one day, I realized that I need to express something deep in my heart that I saw as being an unwillingness to do to create new markets. I thought that would help the company grow, but the last time I expressed that feeling, I got laughed at and shot down like Messerschmitt 109 by a Hurricane over the English Channel . So in 2011 during a Jam session where every employee was allowed to voice their own opinion on stage, I worked up a courage and let me tell you, my heart was pounding so fast, I was sweating, anxiety level through the roof, and yet I said to myself; this is IT. Today is the day to say it. So after hiding my fears for decades, in 2011 I stood up and expressed the truth to my boss. There was a dreaded silence. Every high ranking sales person, top management and the rest of the group were shocked that I expressed this truth. The truth that they knew was true. As though, I felt like I was the little kid in the room and pointed the finger to the emperor and said "but the emperor isn't wearing anything!!" And so he didn't. After the end of the Jam session, a few people in the room took me to the side and congratulate me for being gutsy and thanked me for doing that. But then I realized something else -- everyone who I thought were brave and courageous and tough in mind were so scared to say the truth. I realized they were all yes men and women; all so afraid that if they say the truth, they would jeopardize their jobs, their income and their stature in the company. Next few days, I was summoned to the office by H.R and there, she sat with 2 pieces of paper and my manager sitting beside me. The H.R person was clear that what I said was an insult to the CEO of the company that the truth made him angry. She asked me to apologize by signing the piece of paper in front of me, saying that it was my fault and that if I apologize, I would only incur a record in my employment and would still keep my job. I refused. I said, why should I sign anything when I was only saying the truth when nobody else had to courage to do so! It was Jam session where everyone was allowed to express anything. I told her; well what you are telling me is that -- in Ford's words that I can choose any color I like in a car but it has to be black! She paused a bit; then my manager stepped in and defended me and agreed that what I did was not wrong. Anyhow, I knew my days with the company was numbered. I wasn't happy working there, but somehow I was very happy and relieved that I stood up and spoke the truth. I worked with the company for at least 3 years more and then left in peace. What I found from this experience was that, there was no harm in expressing the truth in public. No physical harm; just threats but we have laws against those threats so I was actually protected by the labour laws! And because of this knowing; I felt like why am I carrying this stupid anxiety all this life?!? So at that point in time, I gave up the spirit self of this anxiety and I hadn't have any anxiety feeling ever since.
In 2012, I began the transformation by having a set of dreams where I would see a slender man (which later I learned to be Master Jesus Christ) and he would show me what books I needed to read. I read some of the books he told me to read and then I got the clarity to contact a person in New Zealand where I got more spiritual healing and teaching from him. I still belong to the Japanese spiritual organization and still teaching their dogma; but I was starting to teach ascended masters teachings in that organization. In 2013, I was inspired to study the 2 year Master Keys to Personal Christhood and finished it in 2015. I think right around that time was when I was faced with the initiation of the 96th level. That was, what helped me spiritually awakened (or spontaneous awakening) and me facing my Sensei and that spiritual organization that continually held a grip on my consciousness. Anyhow, I was asking my Sensei about the spiritual out of body experiences I had with the masters in the etheric realm and yet, my Sensei and the people from the New Zealand group couldn't tell me exactly their experiences. I found that to be odd as they claimed to be enlightened, to have passed their own 96th level of initiation. Not until in early 2018 when I read the My Lives book that the experiences of the initiations and other initiations were faithfully explained and described. I mean, how could one describe exactly in detail about being in Mexico, only if you have been physically there! Well, when Kim Michaels wrote that book; I knew you can't write something so detailed and precise about those initiations unless he had experienced and could describe and write about it. The book, My Lives, was the confirmation I needed and sort of a guide what I had experienced in 2015 that I could not get from those people. Anyhow, I left the society in 2016. I did not have any animosity towards my Sensei. I simply, at the time, had certain illusions that I upheld and I saw Sensei as one that I worshipped because I had that illusion. When I dissolve that illusion, I had no need to be with the society anymore. The divorce was not easy. It was in itself an initiation, but I was at the time aware that I no longer need an outer teacher. I had made contact with several inner teachers (the ascended masters) and my I AM that I no longer need any outer guru to tell me or answer my questions. Seek within and you shall know the truth.
After the divorce from the society, I still practice their form of meditation and energy healing to manage some of my pain. But then, as I work to heal my psychologies with decrees and invocations, I did less meditation and less energy healing until about 2017, I stopped needing to meditate to achieve clarity of the mind. Right now, it is getting easier to resolve my own issues on what I need to do with decrees and invocations. I can tune in to the masters and then do a short decree like less than a minute and have great effect. Like I can do MORE and MORE with less invocations.
I still continue to heal myself and continue to discover subtle separate selves, but I now see this as my life and purpose. Raise my level of consciousness and serve the community where everyone else hopefully will benefit from my contribution to the collective and my examples in the community where I work in nursing.
I hope this will help many of you see that, the awakening process takes gradual steps. I might be a few exceptions where I got a spontaneous awakening and the process of growth was somehow shortened. But I felt that, I had some higher level of attainment in past lives that I didn't need to go through the step by step process that some of you may need to go through. However, let it be clear that anyone can be awakened fully just like me, pass the initiations and walk a much higher path. Whatever issues you have in you you will need to resolve spiritually. No physical methods can help you heal. Only healing your psychology can help you heal the whole.
Happy New Year and see you all again in 2019!
David.
In this end of the year, I am inspired by my I AM Presence to write a piece about my own personal awakening process, so I can share with all of you the process of how I got to where I am today. What I am writing to you is about someone who was not spiritual all his life, awakened and then embracing the masters teaching.
When I was young boy, I always had this sense that I am not a human being, but rather someone who is spiritual and out of this world. At the age of 3 or so (I can't remember the exact age), I was visited by a female light being (she was a form of bright sparkling light; wavy curtain light with the brilliance of a fine silk cloth) that looks almost like an angel from a book I read somewhere when I was young. At least that was what I believed an angel should look like. I remembered that her presence was warm, comforting and reassuring to me. That motherly reassurance was not something that I had ever received from a human being. At least not the women I had dated and slept with (had sex with). Not even my biological mother could give this spiritual motherly love. It was as if that connection was made in my heart. Of course over the years, my disappointment from the women I dated and had sex with were they couldn't give me that same feeling, usually after an orgasm or two I expected something in the heart. But it usually ended up being very empty feeling and then I have to work up another sexual session only to experience another physical orgasm and nothing else afterwards. Anyhow, I don't want to go on a tangent here with women, but that was that motherly love that I received from this female spiritual being that I couldn't get from the physical. Also when I was younger, I was also suffering from G.A.D (General Anxiety Disorder) and I was anxious in the public. I was not able to do a public speech or even introducing myself to the group caused me to sweat profusely. So when I was young, I always tried to sit at the back of class and possibly hide myself from my teacher or classmates, because I simply don't want to be picked out by my teacher to do a speech or even read out loud. Strangely enough, I am very social in the group and I always have a sense that I like being a community leader, but if someone asked me to speak on stage -- NO WAY JOSE man.. No way!
Afflicted with G.A.D, I was basically living an introverted life. I was alone and I felt that if I isolate myself from the public, I will feel better. So I took up a hobby in computers; building, repairing and programming. Also at the same time, my doctor prescribed me with Prozac to manage my anxiety disorder and my depression at the time, because I didn't have a lot of friends then. My sister had way more friends than I did. After taking Prozac, I felt good again and started to become active and venturing out into the public. But there is a side effect to taking Prozac and that was weight gain. So I was a bit chubby and I suddenly crave a lot of sugary and salty stuff like chocolate, burgers, fries -- anything that isn't what you call it very healthy. Anyhow, my dad who was a distant runner himself decided to get me into running in the attempt to help me shave my weight and as a reward for doing that, he'll buy me breakfast after the run. And so, at 4 AM on every Sunday morning, he would wake me up and get me dressed for the run. At first, I hated waking up that early. I mean, I was 13 years old and I needed my long sleep. But my dad wouldn't have any of those excuses from me. We need to run to save my weight! One the first few Sundays, I hated the run. I just hated it!! Huffing and puffing and sweating; I thought who the bloody hell ever invented running as a past time!?! How can one really enjoy running!!!??!! Bloody s**t and bloody f**ing hell were my normal cursing language at the time while running up the bloody f**ing mountain. I simply don't understand how my dad could have enjoyed running at all! He must be a total nut case. I thought my dad lost his marbles; he was insane to take me out running! But with all that anger, the breakfast with lots of bacon and eggs and buttery toast and the hot Horlicks (an Asian tasty drink like milk tea) usually cooled me down. Ok I said, this wasn't so bad.
Anyhow, after a month later, I think my body started to get acclimatized to it and I actually enjoyed running. Another benefit that came from running was that, it helped managed my anxiety, my migraines and depression. After the run, I felt really good and fresh. And soon, I was off Prozac. As long as I run at least 2 to 3 times a week, I was able to manage the symptoms of my anxiety, depression and migraines. I ran so much that I joined my local school's track and field team and ran the national in Hong Kong (I was living there for a bit with parents) and won Bronze. I was proud then and I felt I was so good. Then in 1984, my dad decided to move to Canada due to the China's repatriation of Hong Kong. He didn't want to have any dealing with the Communist system. So when I landed in a new country, Canada, with no friends, my anxiety and depression came roaring back. I still managed to control the symptoms with running, but now I had another problem. All of a sudden, I had lower back issues and also my neck started to feel sore out of the blue. At first, I attributed this to simply running too much. So what I did was I lessened my running and yet the back and neck pain persists. And so, in order to fix my back and neck issues, I started seeing both a Chiropractor and a Physiotherapist. I also started working for a Japanese camera company at the time so I had the benefits to pay for those visits. Anyhow, I managed to control the symptoms, but those symptoms of anxiety, migraines and depression never actually went away. Year after year, I have more anxiety, migraines and depression and year after year, I have to do more sports like running marathons, doing long distance cycling and swimming and therapy just to manage my issues. It became so bad that I literally spent in some years the whole day training for a marathon or cycling for days to just feel good. At that time also, my work in the Japanese company was not smooth and easy going. While working, I have this sense within myself to express the truth about how I feel is the truth. But every time I wanted to express this truth out loud in public, in front of my CEO and boss, I heard this voice telling me -- don't do this, it is very bad to say that to your boss. Be loyal and work hard and you'll be happy. And every time I felt this way, I always feel very angry to myself for not being gutsy enough to stand up and speak the truth. Then something else beats me up inside saying that you should say the truth and speak out. And this conflict and chaos was causing me anxiety, depression and migraines because I should have done something but I didn't! But then, it was always me since I was young that I didn't have a say on anything I want to do. It was always some authority figure that tells me what to do. Also when I was younger, my dad told me that lying is good; it gets you ahead in business. So I was in conflict being a liar and telling the truth. Anyhow, I'm getting ahead of myself again here which sometimes I do; sorry.
A few years later, the anxiety and depression got so bad that I almost contemplated of commiting suicide. There was this voice telling me that my life wasn't worth the while. I am better of dead and that my life was completely meaningless. It was in 1999 where there was this doomsday prediction that the world actually would come to pass. It would end. So at the time, I was actually involving in some very risky activities and I didn't care a bit about my life. If it ends in 1999, then so be it. I was happy to see that my misery would end in 1999. But then, I had this thought and feeling of that motherly love, the same feeling I had when I was 3. Then and there, she appeared in my dreams telling me that I am destined to do something great, something so profound that when I come to realize this, I will know what it truly meant. When I awoke, I was full of sweat and somehow bruised. I didn't know how I got these bruises, but now I think it was those dark forces who realized that I am awakening and that they tried to suppress me and encourage to commit suicide or die. To stop me to even start my mission.
Anyhow, after that experience and my dad's insistence that I should take up martial arts, I decided to enrol myself into a Japanese martial arts society. I felt I was drawn to this particular society because of the words they used in their website, which I later on realized, it was the energy that were in the words that I recognized. The energy of oneness, the energy of Christhood (their definition is the universe in always moving and never stops) and the energy of unity.
Besides, running, swimming and cycling were getting way out of hand and my dark thoughts of killing myself -- I needed something spiritual, something Zen to help me get myself into the right focus.
This spiritual society is very unique in a sense that it teaches, martial arts, meditation and energy healing as a whole unit with the emphasis of oneness with the universe; which is your I AM. Their teachings are in fact very similar to the Ascended Master teachings. At the time, I didn't know what Ascended Masters are and who are they. Anyhow, the Japanese spiritual society resonated with me and the chief Sensei was able to teach me spiritual meditation and energy healing plus martial arts that these teachings actually helped me reduce my anxiety, depression and migraines that I didn't have to rely on physical means like running, cycling and swimming to manage them. As my meditation got deeper and deeper, I started to get a sense that there is something more than this Earth and that there is this presence that I should connect to. At the time during my energy healing training, I also was a natural in being the channel for the holy spirit. Within 6 months of a 2 years energy healing training, I was able to do what my Sensei could only master in 8 years! In fact the other students was asking Sensei; what David could do this or that and why we couldn't? Sensei had to concoct some excuses to explain away. But Sensei seemed to have a sense that I am different. For me, this society gave me a sense of belonging and acceptance. I quickly became an instructional assistance, teaching students on how to become the conduit for the holy spirit. It was somewhat natural to me and that sometimes got the other official instructors who held black belts, in their jealousy taunt me or sometime try to correct me what I wasn't teaching right. But I always felt that they were teaching in a linear way with a linear mindset and not with a spiritual mind. Anyhow, belonging to this spiritual society was the best choice I made, because I actually, or so I thought cured all my ailments. No anxiety, no depression, no migraines and back and neck pain were managed and under control that for once, I was pain free. And then at the time, I was even more bold, willing to be in public and so I represent my Japanese company as a professional imaging rep and technician, speaking with people from different backgrounds and for a while espousing spiritual teachings disguising as camera and electronics talk. You have to internalize the spiritual teachings and then paraphrase it in your own words and your experience to teach others, so others can relate to your teachings. Everything went well; I have a teaching position in my spiritual organization, I was pain free and the company I worked at was doing well and I was making good money.
BUT -- BUT. I still have this feeling that I didn't quite do what I am supposed to do. It was this nagging feeling, despite everything outside of me are good.
Then one day, I realized that I need to express something deep in my heart that I saw as being an unwillingness to do to create new markets. I thought that would help the company grow, but the last time I expressed that feeling, I got laughed at and shot down like Messerschmitt 109 by a Hurricane over the English Channel . So in 2011 during a Jam session where every employee was allowed to voice their own opinion on stage, I worked up a courage and let me tell you, my heart was pounding so fast, I was sweating, anxiety level through the roof, and yet I said to myself; this is IT. Today is the day to say it. So after hiding my fears for decades, in 2011 I stood up and expressed the truth to my boss. There was a dreaded silence. Every high ranking sales person, top management and the rest of the group were shocked that I expressed this truth. The truth that they knew was true. As though, I felt like I was the little kid in the room and pointed the finger to the emperor and said "but the emperor isn't wearing anything!!" And so he didn't. After the end of the Jam session, a few people in the room took me to the side and congratulate me for being gutsy and thanked me for doing that. But then I realized something else -- everyone who I thought were brave and courageous and tough in mind were so scared to say the truth. I realized they were all yes men and women; all so afraid that if they say the truth, they would jeopardize their jobs, their income and their stature in the company. Next few days, I was summoned to the office by H.R and there, she sat with 2 pieces of paper and my manager sitting beside me. The H.R person was clear that what I said was an insult to the CEO of the company that the truth made him angry. She asked me to apologize by signing the piece of paper in front of me, saying that it was my fault and that if I apologize, I would only incur a record in my employment and would still keep my job. I refused. I said, why should I sign anything when I was only saying the truth when nobody else had to courage to do so! It was Jam session where everyone was allowed to express anything. I told her; well what you are telling me is that -- in Ford's words that I can choose any color I like in a car but it has to be black! She paused a bit; then my manager stepped in and defended me and agreed that what I did was not wrong. Anyhow, I knew my days with the company was numbered. I wasn't happy working there, but somehow I was very happy and relieved that I stood up and spoke the truth. I worked with the company for at least 3 years more and then left in peace. What I found from this experience was that, there was no harm in expressing the truth in public. No physical harm; just threats but we have laws against those threats so I was actually protected by the labour laws! And because of this knowing; I felt like why am I carrying this stupid anxiety all this life?!? So at that point in time, I gave up the spirit self of this anxiety and I hadn't have any anxiety feeling ever since.
In 2012, I began the transformation by having a set of dreams where I would see a slender man (which later I learned to be Master Jesus Christ) and he would show me what books I needed to read. I read some of the books he told me to read and then I got the clarity to contact a person in New Zealand where I got more spiritual healing and teaching from him. I still belong to the Japanese spiritual organization and still teaching their dogma; but I was starting to teach ascended masters teachings in that organization. In 2013, I was inspired to study the 2 year Master Keys to Personal Christhood and finished it in 2015. I think right around that time was when I was faced with the initiation of the 96th level. That was, what helped me spiritually awakened (or spontaneous awakening) and me facing my Sensei and that spiritual organization that continually held a grip on my consciousness. Anyhow, I was asking my Sensei about the spiritual out of body experiences I had with the masters in the etheric realm and yet, my Sensei and the people from the New Zealand group couldn't tell me exactly their experiences. I found that to be odd as they claimed to be enlightened, to have passed their own 96th level of initiation. Not until in early 2018 when I read the My Lives book that the experiences of the initiations and other initiations were faithfully explained and described. I mean, how could one describe exactly in detail about being in Mexico, only if you have been physically there! Well, when Kim Michaels wrote that book; I knew you can't write something so detailed and precise about those initiations unless he had experienced and could describe and write about it. The book, My Lives, was the confirmation I needed and sort of a guide what I had experienced in 2015 that I could not get from those people. Anyhow, I left the society in 2016. I did not have any animosity towards my Sensei. I simply, at the time, had certain illusions that I upheld and I saw Sensei as one that I worshipped because I had that illusion. When I dissolve that illusion, I had no need to be with the society anymore. The divorce was not easy. It was in itself an initiation, but I was at the time aware that I no longer need an outer teacher. I had made contact with several inner teachers (the ascended masters) and my I AM that I no longer need any outer guru to tell me or answer my questions. Seek within and you shall know the truth.
After the divorce from the society, I still practice their form of meditation and energy healing to manage some of my pain. But then, as I work to heal my psychologies with decrees and invocations, I did less meditation and less energy healing until about 2017, I stopped needing to meditate to achieve clarity of the mind. Right now, it is getting easier to resolve my own issues on what I need to do with decrees and invocations. I can tune in to the masters and then do a short decree like less than a minute and have great effect. Like I can do MORE and MORE with less invocations.
I still continue to heal myself and continue to discover subtle separate selves, but I now see this as my life and purpose. Raise my level of consciousness and serve the community where everyone else hopefully will benefit from my contribution to the collective and my examples in the community where I work in nursing.
I hope this will help many of you see that, the awakening process takes gradual steps. I might be a few exceptions where I got a spontaneous awakening and the process of growth was somehow shortened. But I felt that, I had some higher level of attainment in past lives that I didn't need to go through the step by step process that some of you may need to go through. However, let it be clear that anyone can be awakened fully just like me, pass the initiations and walk a much higher path. Whatever issues you have in you you will need to resolve spiritually. No physical methods can help you heal. Only healing your psychology can help you heal the whole.
Happy New Year and see you all again in 2019!
David.
Comments
Post a Comment